I Tried The Starbucks Unicorn Frappuccino So You Don’t Have To

Hey everyone, Jason Burrows from 96.5 Jack-FM here… Wait, this isn’t a commercial, scratch that. HI THERE. I’m a little hyper right now because I just finished a Venti Unicorn Frappuccino from the Starbucks across the street from our studios here in South Lake Union. They’re under the new Seattle Facebook HQ, so they’re never busy, it’s weird… ANYWAY, here are my thoughts on this remarkable confection.

It’s clear that they’ve made SO MANY of these things in the past few hours that the baristas at Starbucks have it down to an art. The blue swirl hits the cup first, followed by the purple blended action. I got a Venti, so there was a LOT of liquid. On top, the standard issue whipped cream topper, but with blue & purple sprinkles. I thought it was just colored sugar. I was WRONG.

The initial flavor I got was “Berries & Cream.” Very much like that old school Starburst commercial, you know the one.

The sprinkles on top are NOT sugar. They’re the opposite. They’re sour. Like, Sour Patch Kids that came to kick you in the mouth. Same with the blue swirl, very tart, like a blue raspberry Warhead.

Once I stirred everything together, the tartness from the sprinkles & the swirl mixed with the Berries & the Cream to form a really awesome flavor that I just don’t know how to explain.

Some people say that they got mango. Those people also like cilantro & should not be trusted. Or they just got a different mixture of the sweet & sour than I did, we’ll never truly know.

EITHER WAY, it was good. It was super sweet since my Venti contained 76 grams of sugar & 500 calories. Man, I’m going to need to go run after this.

The one thing it doesn’t have is caffeine, which is disappointing. I was hoping for a Red Bull style crash later. The Washington Post says that it tastes like sour birthday cake & shame. They’re not wrong, but I liked it anyway…

I’m Jason from Jack-FM, I’m going to go take a nap now.


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